Issue date: 4/10/08 Section: News

SC: Kingmaker! Kingmaker! I'm tired of pretending that I don't control the political process. People don't believe me anymore when I say I don't have influence over the process. And you know what, I'm going to accept it. I'm the kingmaker, what I say goes. And it's up to the candidates to decide if they want the benediction of the "Colbert bump." It's up to them, it's totally up to them. It's out of my hands now. If they come on, by proximity to me, it's like radioactive popularity. Check out this week's U.S. News and World Report - the "Colbert bump" is REAL. There's a report in U.S. News and World Report. Go read it.

DP: I'll be sure to do that.

SC: Do it! ...EMILY!

DP: What's your favorite part about your job?

SC: That it asks of me everything I know how to do. You know, people ask me what I want to do next, and I don't really have many ambitions beyond this, because everything I know how to do, I do in this show.

DP: If Hillary and Obama were in fact to have a bowl-off, who do you think would win?

SC: Do they get to put those gutter bumpers in, like the six-year-olds?

DP: Well considering Obama's last bowling game, I don't know...

SC: I think America would win, Emily.

DP: Why did you decide to have a show like "The Colbert Report" and go into this field?

SC: It wasn't a decision. It was a series of decisions that painted me into the corner of comedy, and I decided I liked it there.

DP: Okay. So after the whole, "Who made Mike Huckabee thing - who REALLY made Mike Huckabee?

SC: I did.

DP: You did?

SC: Yes.

DP: Okay. I'll let you get back to what I assume is a pretty busy job, but thank you so much for taking the time to talk to me.

SC: Are you going to come see the show?

DP: I am.

SC: I'll see you there.

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